How is it possible that one person can live having experienced so much pain, yet another can have no idea what that feels like. How can one person have been that unlucky yet the other be so blessed? How can you ever connect with others when there are people out there that have felt no real sorrow, no death, no bullying, no heartbreak, no uncertainty at all? Is it wrong to feel this is unusual to have never expletives any of this? Or is it wrong to have experienced more pain than is normal? I don’t know. But I find it difficult to feel connected to someone who has no idea how any of that feels, and has no wish to imagine it. Is it selfish to ask that my experiences be considered? Probably. It is selfish to expect me to be ‘lighter’ because I should be happy now. Probably. So what is right? What do I do? How do I overcome the sadness which sweeps in? How do I learn to trust when all of my past experiences have resulted in a loss of trust. How can I be light when I feel so heavy? It’s exhausting how much energy it uses to not succumb to darkness. But how do you explain that to a blessed person? Especially one who rarely communicates in a real way, but through random quotes and baby talk. One who resorts to saying awful things to hurt you when you are already hurting, because they are annoyed you are still hurt. Where is the logic in that? I don’t know. All I know is that it hurts.
82keystomymind 